How to Lead When You Aren't Upfront and In-Person

Until March 2020, most leaders and pastors were comfortable leading in-person and from upfront. So, when we abruptly found ourselves leading remotely and from behind a screen, it became a bit disorienting, even humbling if we’re willing to admit it.

And if we’re really honest, it has called into question our vocation, value, and purpose altogether. After all, who are we if we can’t lead from upfront? What is our role even as a pastor and a leader?

What if our current circumstances simply put us in a position to lead in a different way: By serving others so that they can fulfill their purpose and mission. And the best way we do that? By equipping and empowering them.

The Essential Thing

I’ll be so bold as to say that I believe that as a pastor and a leader, effectively equipping and empowering others is essential for our churches and organizations to fulfill their mission and vision.

If the success of your church or organization hinges on you being involved in every single detail and decision, it’s simply not a shared effort.  You’re not working with and through others.  It doesn’t require trust, it doesn’t require creativity on the part of others, it doesn’t require a community.  A true community is diverse in perspectives, interdependent, creative towards fulfilling its mission and vision.

Creating this kind of community requires pastors and leaders to embrace equipping and empowering others.  In order to do so well, pastors and leaders must learn to lead by values rather than rules and regulations and more rules.  You can always tell when pastors and leaders aren’t leading by values.  As soon as a new situation comes up, they simply add another rule to the rule book under the guise of “protecting people and the organization.”  The only real value-in-use is “don’t break the rules.”

Here’s the reality: constantly intervening in every decision (to control them) kills motivation, trust, ownership, involvement, and creativity.

When you lead through values, there’s no need for constantly intervening and controlling every decision.  Value-based church and organizational cultures are filled with people who are empowered to make decisions based on the church’s or organization’s values and culture.

Why is this so hard?

Here’s why it can be really hard for some pastor and leaders to empower others: empowering others requires that pastors and leaders actually share their power, not merely loan it.  Shared power means pastors and leaders truly give others the ability and responsibility to make their own decisions and let them be responsible for the results (intended or not).

Loaned power is much easier though and more common. Think of it like “helicopter parenting.”  There can be an appearance of shared power, however, as soon as the pastor or leader has the perception that things are not going the way they wanted them to go, they swoop in to “save the day.”  What this is really telling people is “I don’t actually trust you, so here let me help make it right.”

When power loaning is the overarching culture in a church or organization, it kills trust, motivation, involvement, ownership, and creativity.  And let’s be honest, many people are okay with this kind of leadership because it doesn’t require anything of them.  But that’s not what we’re called to do as we serve others. If we genuinely believe that God has created each person with value, purpose, and calling, then we can’t lead in such a way that people can simply act as spectators rather than participants.

Being spread out and unable to lead from upfront the way that we’ve always done it gives us an incredible opportunity to equip and empower others to participate in ways that they maybe never have. So how do we do it?

Effectively equipping and empowering others

Equipping and empowering others to take on roles that are new to them can be broken down into 3 steps: Model, Equip, and Empower.

1. The first step is to model for others how it is you do what you do and want them to do. You can think of it as “modeling the way” or “discipleship.” The best way to do this is through proximity to you (even if that’s simply joining you on a Zoom call right now). When they are with you (virtually or in-person) model for them how and why you do what you do. This is how you pass on the values and culture of your congregation or organization.
2. Then equip them to do it themselves by making sure they have all the resources they need to thrive.
3. And then you empower them by sharing your power and authority with them so that they can take ownership of it and share the responsibility of it.

Whenever we equip and empower someone to take on something new to them, it will likely be stretching or challenging for them at first. But with the right amount of encouragement and support along the way, they’ll continue to grow and develop as you serve them.

Depending on the person, something stretching or challenging could be praying in a group setting, leading a Bible study, recruiting volunteers, starting a small group, speaking in front of others, leading a team, starting a ministry. The possibilities are endless actually.

As you model, equip, and empower others to fulfill their purpose and calling, you will realize that even though leading from upfront was stripped from you, who you are as a servant leader hasn’t been taken from you. In fact, you’ve been given more opportunities to empower others in their purpose and calling as we’ve been spread out across our communities.