Is this what’s keeping you from trying something new? (What I learned from signing up for my first Ironman)
You might not know that I signed up for my first Ironman in 2014. The night before the 2014 Madison Ironman, I was sitting on the shore of Lake Monona contemplating signing up for the 2015 race. I was incredibly undecided, but maybe not for the reason you’re thinking.
When my friend who was with me asked me why I wouldn’t sign up for it, a flood of reasons came to mind. And when I weeded through all of them, the real reason was this: I knew I wouldn’t win.
When I said it aloud to my friend, it sounded absolutely absurd. I wasn’t a professional triathlete. In fact, I had only recently gotten into triathlons. Of course, I wouldn’t win.
It was the first time that I really had come face-to-face with my perfectionism and my inner drive to be and do the best at everything.
Once I got down to the root of my fear of failure, I could be honest about the fact that there was no way that I would win the 2015 Madison Ironman. And that that’s not why you do it anyway.
So, two days later, I registered for the 2015 Madison Ironman. And I spent a year training for it: finishing my first official half marathon, finishing my first official half IRONMAN, meeting my now-husband in the run club I joined and making some of the best friends.
During my Ironman race, I faced my biggest fear after having a great swim and biking 84 miles of the 140-mile swim/bike/run course: I wasn’t going to finish. And that was okay.
Was I disappointed? Absolutely, I was devastated. BUT that didn’t mean that year had been lost or wasted or that there was nothing to learn from it or that it was all for naught.
I won that year, but not the way that I thought I would. I don’t have a finisher medal from the 2015 Madison Ironman, but I have so much more than that. Just because things took a different turn than I had imagined they would when I started doesn’t mean I failed or that I’m a failure.
Any innovative pastor and leader will tell you: it’s impossible to discover a new way of doing something without actually trying something new. Facing the fear of failure isn’t just essential for innovators. It’s essential for every pastor and leader who is leading today. But how can you face it?
Pastors and leaders of thriving churches and organizations are experts at embracing unintended outcomes because they know there is no shame in things not turning out the way they imagined they might, or even hoped they would.
If the fear of failure gets in the way of trying something new, you need new beliefs. Here are three that innovators rely on. They will empower you to try something new even when risks are involved.
“I will learn something new.”
When learning, rather than perfection, is our standard, we hit the mark every time. Having high standards and learning can be congruent. But perfection will fail us every time. And it mentally holds us back from trying anything new because we know the risk of things not turning out the exact way we envision is a reality. While perfection is impossible; learning can happen every time.
“I am not a failure, no matter the outcome.”
Fear of failure is often tied to a mindset that if I fail, that makes me a failure. In reality, when things don’t turn out the way we imagine, it makes us human. So, when things don’t go the way we imagined they might, decide in advance to try something different the next time. And go into trying something new with the mindset shift that “I am not a failure, no matter the outcome.”
“This problem is worth solving.”
In order for us to face our fear of failure, we also need to care enough about the problem or challenge we’re facing and decide that it is worth solving. When we are passionate about finding a solution because the problem in front us of is worth solving, our fear of failure will take a back seat.
Our beliefs about who we are and what happens when things don’t go the way we hope or imagine they will, shape our lives, how we lead, and the communities around us.
