How to Reduce Tension in Your Church During Seasons of Change

Are you caught in the middle of starting to connect with new people online and hearing pleas from others who wanted to go back to the way things were? Or any other aspect of the new ways of doing things and how we used to do things?

During seasons of change, it’s natural to feel caught between a vision for moving forward into new opportunities and wanting to honor how things have been and those who want things to go back to “normal”.

The reality is most of us only like change when we choose it…which isn’t very often unless we’re talking what’s for breakfast…wait we don’t change that often either. Exactly. So, when change is forced upon us, like say by a worldwide pandemic, then most people will be pining for how things used to be. Unless they’re the 2.5% of innovators in the world who love joining in on new things or the 13.5% of early adopters who follow suit after they see that there are benefits to the new way of doing things. That leaves 84% of people who won’t be eager to adapt to new ways of doing things until they see that it’s practical, know that there is plenty of help and support for them, or are forced to change because there aren’t any other options for them.

So, you know that an online component or other recent changes are essential for moving forward, but how do you help others in your congregation embrace the change?

Why is Change So Hard?!

When it comes to changing “how” you do things, most change efforts fail or cause unnecessary tension and anxiety at best) if there isn’t equal attention paid to your culture as well. Culture is essentially how and why we do things around here through our values, behaviors, and norms. It’s why and how we welcome people to our services. It’s the language we use to communicate with people. It’s the way we hire new people. It’s what gets printed in the bulletin. It’s the content we share.

Here's why there's a rub whenever things change: cultures act to preserve themselves. As Edgar Schein puts it, culture “is our learned solution to making sense of the world, to stabilizing it, and to avoiding the anxiety that comes with social chaos.” Just imagine how much weight people in our congregations place on how we do things.

So, if any type of change feels like it is threatening people’s very culture, people will do almost anything to preserve it.

A look in the Biblical Gospels reveal that the same was true of the religious rulers in Jesus’ day; their motives were stronger towards preserving their religious culture, than was their desire to change towards love for people and mercy towards others (Matthew 7:28-9; 11:18-9, etc.).

With Covid, the “how we do what we do” has changed for most of us. Your values may not have shifted at all in the past 5 months, but “how” they play out during the week may be entirely different.

And often, people don’t realize that all that has changed is “how” things are done, not "why" they are done. So, if we change how things are done without also paying close attention to our culture, even changing things on the surface will not ultimately have any effect except to annoy people or create conflict.

How to Give Attention to Your Culture

Paying close attention to your culture looks like taking a couple of actions that we often take for granted. The first is that the importance of communicating your values cannot be overstated. Sharing your community’s core values verbally, in writing, at every gathering, etc. and how they have shaped the way things have been done until now as well as how they continue to shape how things are being done now is vital. You cannot overshare the why behind the what!

Another often overlooked means of communication is how you personally live out these values. Giving people a visual example by modeling the way through your own behaviors is incredibly effective in helping people embrace changes in how things are done. Remember, 84% of people will not be eager to adapt to new ways of doing things until they see that it’s practical, know that there is plenty of help and support for them, or are forced to change because there aren’t any other options for them.

You might find it helpful to identify which of your current behaviors support or work against your core values. Ask yourself questions like

• How can I demonstrate my commitment to our values in this new season?
• If I genuinely believe x, y, & z, what will be the visible evidence to others?

And then, adjust accordingly.

And, if you're looking to explore how God might be inviting you and your congregation into deeper connections in a disruptive moment, check out the online Faithful Innovation Community cohort through FaithLead.

While tensions are high right now for a number of reasons, one way to help reduce the anxiety in our communities is by reminding people of our values and that even though how we do things might change over time, our values haven't.